Day 1...

So. Started my job at LDS Family Services today. I'll be working there from 10am-9pm Tuesdays. Probably don't look for me on Tuesdays much...if my first day was reflective of all days, it's gonna be pretty busy. I'm grateful for all my helpful co-workers...I tried to not bug any one person too much and by the time I went home, I'm pretty sure I'd asked every single employee at least one question.

It was a long, exhausting day, but I'm excited. I love the feeling there. I love that the pace, issues, and atmosphere are so much different than community mental health. So...I'll be grateful for my Tuesdays but also for my other job M, W-F...they both have elements that I need and enjoy.

A few things I learned: 1-everyone is helpful but a few questions should be saved for the afternoon workers...they're extra helpful, 2-about once every 2 hours it sounds like a train is going to rip through my office. If I had a big enough window, I'd be able to see the tracks from it...very close. Gotta get used to that, 3-drinking fountain water=not filtered. Will check to see if kitchen has filtered water. Very important...

Happy Halloween!

Mom & Loodles, you've out done yourselves. Lobster-Dog?!?!? :) Amazing.

Suffering...

I often write about frivolous and random things. Tonight, not so much. Spent much of today thinking about suffering. The role of suffering in the development of the soul. The purpose and need for it in our lives. How much (but not all) of the suffering I see in my job stems from disobedience...to the laws of God and man. Sometimes we create our own suffering. Sometimes others help us with that. Sometimes it comes for no reason at all and seems to steal happiness like the drop of a roller coaster steals our breath...in a moment.

Although I need to maintain some degree of "distance" from the people and/or issues I work with in my job as a therapist, there are still moments when I fight to keep my own tears in. And in my mind rattles around all I learned in grad school about professionalism, empathy, the therapeutic relationship, and the sacred responsibility I have to balance each of these elements in a way that allows (and hopefully even helps), a person to heal.

In the moments when the tears almost come I feel worried and then relieved. It is good to feel. When I have a devastated 5 yr old in front of me, I feel. When I have a teenager who hates everyone and everything in the room with me, I feel. When I stop in the silent moment to notice how very green the grass is and that the sky is still so blue, I feel. When I run across a darling friend whose heart is hurting, I feel. And when I stand with a pal under a full moon on a perfect October night to laugh at everything and nothing in a ridiculous conversation that is as inconsequential as it is monumental, I feel.

Best Part of My Day...

When my 6-yr. old client stated to me:

"You Smell Like Crackers"

Quite honestly I don't know what that means. We were right next to the dry erase board and the markers do smell weird. I'm hoping maybe it was the markers. Or at least some good-smelling crackers. ;)

Marnin and the Mattress

So. Today I set out to buy a new bed. I am not as young as I used to be (ask Sher, she'll confirm)...and my shoulders and back are hurting in the mornings. Now this could possibly be due to the car accident that totalled my car 16 months ago...but either way, it's time for a new bed.

I have never purchased a bed, as I've always had the luxury of a borrowed Blair bed. I walked into the bed store of my choosing and was met by an eager salesman. Now, the idea of having an entire ROOM full of beds that are more comfortable than the one I currently own was great. What was NOT great was having a 45 yr. old man following me around as I tested them all out. It seems weird to talk to a salesman while you're lying down.

I wanted to shop around which displeased my little salesman enough that he suddenly wanted to pay my sales tax and throw in free delivery. Now, the delivery was probably always free, the sales tax a nice touch, but still. So I walked out but not before formally meeting my mattress man, Marnin. Yes, you heard me. M-A-R-N-I-N. It took me several tries to get it right and he finally said "it's unusual." I wanted to say "you aren't a a'jokin' pal."

As I got in my car to make my way to Costco to check out the Sealy they sell at a whiz-bang price, I called Mom to make sure I wasn't getting ripped off. After all, she's bought a lot of beds. She knows her stuff. I expressed my concern about not being able to find sheets (most importantly flannel sheets) for the 14-inch mattress that would soon be mine. She eased my troubled mind by telling me she at that moment was in her local Costco and had her very hands on a set of lovely flannel sheets that were guaranteed to fit up to a 15-inch mattress.

So, assured that Marnin was not messing with me, I picked up a nice pair of white-with-red-snowflakes flannel sheets at my local Costco and made my way back to Marnin my mattress man. The deal was made (after the demonstration wherein he poured coffee on a square cut from the "protect-a-bed" and told me how great it would be to extend the life of my mattress...I politely told him no thanks while I thought about saying "I don't wet the bed and I don't drink coffee so I think I'm all set Marnin, let's get this done.")

The bed will be here Monday. Hallelujah.

P.S. Based on the 1990 US Census, Marnin was ranked number 0 on the list of most popular boys' names in the United States. But, you can change this. Please see http://www.marnin.com/marnins.htm for more information. And yes, this is for real.

The World Needs a Hammock...

Today I was able to leave work for two hours due to a killer headache and the good fortune of having a few clients cancel. I came home and laid in my hammock and read for almost an hour. It was sunny and warm but not hot. The grass was extra green and the sky extra blue. The birds sang in just the perfect cadence, pitch, and rhythm so as to be an enjoyable background to my reading. These moments are few and far between. I remembered how much I love to read and thought about how I'm going to make more time for it. Also thought about how much I love my hammock. The world needs a hammock.

Reasons to Smile...

• pine-scented candles
• flannel season is upon us
• general conference weekend
• below 100-degree highs
• a new season of the office
• lisa comes this weekend
• the scorpions are starting to slumber
• pally's twins are now almost 3 lbs, doing well INSIDE the tummy (keep growing little wonders...just a little bit longer please!)
• i now have air conditioning in my office at work...
• therapy with a fiesty 4-yr old who hates me, loves me, and is a tiger all at the same time