Saturday, January 5

It's Plane Simple...

Dear Readers...er, reader?

It's late and I need to be sleeping. But something has been on my mind for almost a week now. To sum it up....one must always exercise caution, restraint, and good judgement in considering what food one will consume on an airplane. Please remember that you are in a confined space. Anything you eat that has the propensity to smell, look and/or sound weird will be intensified by 3,593 when on an airplane.

My flight from SLC to PHX was set up to be rather pleasant, only a minor delay, the spontaneity of having a friend from my ward sitting right next to me on the plane, and plenty of time for sleeping (even if my chair was a non-recliner...).

All was merry and bright until Mr. Salami opened up his potent beef stick and had himself a little feast in the row 5.3 inches behind my head. Now, what the man eats on his own watch is his business, but for the LOVE...a BEEF STICK on a PLANE?!?! Come on! My already queasy stomach had a rough go of things as the beef stick-ing coincided perfectly with the ultra-turbulent turbulence. It could have been a recipe for disaster. Luckily both the beef stick and the turbulence did not last long. Phew.

So for the record...Doritos, corn nuts, anything remotely ranch, processed BEEF...leave it at home okay? The flight really is only about an hour. Can't you make do on the "Plane Crackers, Bi scoff, or Cheese and Crackers" so generously provided by Delta Airlines? They'll also provide milk, juice, coffee, soda or even some alcohol for the correct change. I prefer you NOT chose to drink V-8 of any variety if you are seated in my row, as the smell alone makes me gag, but I'd choose that over a stick of salami any day.

So...you know...just think about it? Save the beef please.

4 comments:

Michelle said...

Oh MY GOSH!!! I know exactly what you mean. We don't keep beef stick in the house because my husband would be constantly eating it.

Yet do you want to know what my father gave my husband for Christmas? A yard-o-beef, oh that makes for plesant evenings.

I truly feel your pain.

Bonnie said...

Hey Jules! I've been a very neglectful blog reader - but I just got myself caught up and I love all of it! You crack me up. Thanks for being you. I miss you!

Kasey and Jim said...

I totally agree! Sorry about the beef stick experience. Hopefully that won't keep you from getting on another plane sometime soon. :)

Mom B said...

P.S. Jules - your very own father ate beef sticks and summer sausage (washed down with a cola beverage) the whole time I was pregnant with Jeff. It was all I could do not to throw up as we watched t.v. So, I know how you feel. P.S.S. You are here at my house, this very night, and I am soooo happy!